Rule of thumb: The more important a call to action is to our soulās evolution, the more Resistance we will feel toward pursuing it.
~ Steven Pressfield, Do the Work
Resistance. As an independent-thinking woman, the word is not necessarily a negative one for me. Resisting a one-size-fits-all status quo is sorta my thing, donāt you know?
The time has come, however, to note the double edge of the sword of resistance. Wielding the sword is pretty incredible. Being on the receiving end is decidedly not.
Steven Pressfield has written a terrific little ebook called Do the Work
which is geared toward anyone creating something new and battling the internal resistance to get it done.
Does this kind of thing happen to you?
Right now Iām working on a book. Scratch that. Right now Iām thinking about working on a book, because I canāt seem to get started despite ample time and a story to tell.
Iāve also been carrying around an exercise band for almost 8 months that has been used once. Iām not sure how Iām going to develop my upper body strength with that level of dedication. On a related note, the plank move is something I could practice in one minute per day and reap benefits from low back strain and shaky balance when hiking, but I have yet to spare the time.
I know Iām not alone here. Your higher self is asking you to do some of the same types of things and you continue to find ways to resist:
- Surfing the internet instead of writing
- Medicating sore muscles instead of strengthening them
- Endlessly planning for your new career/business/project and never taking the first step
If you battle resistance to your higher objectives (or lay down and let it run all over you like I often do), Stevenās ebook might just be the kick in the pants you need.
This is where I have to confess that I found and read his ebook during a planning session for writing my own book. See how resistance works?
The premise of the book is that resistance is instantly created when you attempt to follow your higher nature, delaying āimmediate gratification in favor of long-term growth, health, or integrity.ā The point that really stuck with me is that you can use resistance as a compass, always knowing that you are pointing true north when resistance rears its ugly head.
After all, you donāt get much resistance to plopping on the couch to veg out in front of the television. You get resistance to actually getting up and doing something else.
Stevenās book goes past Resistance and into The Work, which is the meat of the book.
- Starting before you are ready
- Overcoming the wall
- Finishing a project and the fear of success
The summer of work
We just arrived in Edinburgh, Scotland and have booked a month in an apartment in Edinburgh. It is a prime time for me to spend 30 consecutive days working on the book idea. We then have a 30-day housesit job in Brussels in August, which will be a perfect setting for reflecting and rewriting what has already been done.
Should I tell you that after writing the above paragraph Iāve already thought of several things to keep me from doing this? We have friends visiting, and then thereās Warrenās 40th birthday, and so many hikes and things to do in Scotlandā¦I could go on and on.
Resistance is strong, and thatās my cue that this is important. So Iām booking out the time to write every single day we are there. Iām excited and more than a little bit nervous, and I hope to have your support as I take on this project.
Iām taking a swing at Resistance right now by telling you Iāll post my progress on the book weekly on this blog in the sidebar. (Iām also currently chewing my fingernails to shreds after making that commitment.)
Give Stevenās ebook a read and let us know if you are motivated to break through the resistance of a delayed goal in your life. You donāt have to tell us what it is (though weād love to hear it), but weād love to support you as you work through it.
The comments are open for Resistance Bustingā¦now!










And, you know that the first thing you list (āsurfing the internet instead of writingā) has to be the thing Iām doing right this very second?! *Sigh* Resistance. Ookaay, Iāll get back to work (but not before I agree that Stevenās book is just the kick in the pants most of us need - if weāll only now heed his advice).
Best of luck with the writing! Now go do the work. (And, thatās your Accountability Minute.)
For those of you who donāt know, Amber and I were accountability partners (sort of a mini mastermind group) before we left on this trip. She is a huge inspiration to me in both business and getting things done (in fact, Iām convinced she doesnāt sleep). We have never met in person, but weāve bared our souls and trusted each other in business and life decisions over the phone every other week for years, even collaborating on a few projects together.
We donāt have those regular calls anymore because of our trip, so imagine my surprise to check out her blog last week after I finished writing my Do the Work post and see that she had already written about it! Funny to see that we are still on the same wavelength. Thatās what happens when you connect with the people who are truly part of your tribe. Check out her site and see if you get the same inspiration fix I do.
Miss you, Amber!
No, Iām not too big on sleep, Betsy, so your suspicions are right!
I definitely miss our calls, but knowing that weāre somehow always on the same wavelength is reassuring. Youāre absolutely right - itās important to have a tribe and someone who āgetsā you/it. Everyone needs a few āsoul sistersā (and brothers) to be there along the journey.
Weāll catch up soon.
This was just the post I needed today! I too have a book I have been working on (I have 75000 words already but need to write about 25k more words and do a massive editing job). Hubby keeps asking me when I am going to finish the book because he says my true calling is to be a writer. Of course I keep putting it off but never knew why. Now I know thanks to your post!
p.s. I have June pretty much free so this post has inspired me to GET BUSY. I will be following your progress so I hope we both get some major work done on our books next month!
Good for you, April! Iām so impressed that you already have 75k written, and you can make a huge dent in the 25k over the next month (if not complete it).
Iām going to have to keep my moleskin notebook with me at all times since ideas related to the book seem to be running in the background of my mind long after the writing session is over. Do you do this, too?
Please keep in touch and let us know how your book is progressing and Iāll do the same.
Resistance . . . Itās not just for breakfast anymore!
I think EVERYONE will relate to this particular post of yours, Betsy!
Iāve discovered a couple of things to help me deal with resistance and get things done. Iām definitely NOT a time management sort oā guy but Iāve found a system that has helped even me to focus and get stuff done. For me the secret is to break things down into tiny little tasty bites oā goodness.
A simple yet incredibly effective tool Iāve discovered for this is the Pomodoro Technique http://www.pomodorotechnique.com/ Donāt let the words āsystemā or ātechniqueā trouble you as if this is YET ANOTHER thing you have to add to your list of stuff to learn and do. This tool is SO simple you can grasp it in one 20 minute read and implement it right away-but the results will be mind-boggling! (At least they were for me.)
Also, a very handy piece of software designed to use with the Pomodoro Technique is a simple timer you can download here: http://www.focusboosterapp.com/download
Another excellent productivity tool I discovered is Evernote. http://www.evernote.com/ Evernote is so simple that at first its easy not to āgetā how powerful it is and all the ways you can use it to be more productive. One thing I love it for is I can create simple daily āto doā lists. Taking Tim Ferrissās advice (of 4 hour work week fame) I only put on my daily lists 2 or 3 things I WILL get done TODAY! Nothing creates resistence like a looong list of crap you gotta do but you know that a good chunk of it will end up on tomorrowās āto doā list . . . and probably the next day . . . and the next day . . . ad nauseam (though I do also keep on Evernote a āmaster listā of stuff I want to get done at some point.)
What is also great about Evernote is the data is held online so you can access it from different devices (like your smart-phone, ipad, loptop, home computer, etc.) which makes your list always available. But the killer feature to me is I can create āto doā lists with those tiny little ācheck offā boxes. I experience tiny, little mini-gasms of joy every time I get to check off a task! āTake that Resistance!ā
Warren is facing 40. This is particularly interesting to me as I rememember so well what that was like for me. (6 years-and a world away-ago!) That āmilestoneā hit me like a brick in the forehead. By the time 40 came around I was really just beginning the process of implementing changes in my life to get it moving in the direction that I wanted and so it was FAR from what I would consider a ādream lifeā. (In fact it was really . . . um . . . poopy)
Warren, on the other hand, (at least from the outside looking in) appears to be miles ahead of the game. At least heās not going to be sitting around on his 40th birthday whining, āWhat the hell have I done with my life-my life sucks!ā
Heās already started LIVING and not just existing.
Keep up the inspiration!
Tranque, I canāt wait to check out this Pomodoro Technique. Thank you for sharing your āresistance bustingā resources!
Evernote is actually a big part of the whole Married with Luggage Empire (itās a tiny empire that fits inside a backpack, but we like to call it an empire nonetheless). We track everything from our notes about new places to new recipes we find on the road to client info and even the notes for the book. I love that is syncs up to the cloud and I never have to worry about losing what Iāve written (which has happened with other apps). I can write something on the Mac and then later work on via the iPad if Warren is using the laptop. Brilliant. No excuses for not getting stuff done. (Man, we sound like an infomercial for Evernote, donāt we?)
As for birthdays, we are really jazzed about this Sunday and Warrenās 40th. Me because I will finally stop being the butt of his āolder womanā jokes for at least a few months, and Warren because he will be the topic of the ādirty limerickā roast with a couple of friends who are joining us in Edinburgh this weekend. In all seriousness, though, we intentionally set out to celebrate our 40th birthdays on this trip because of the question that started this whole thing in the first place: āIf you knew you wouldnāt make it past 40, how would you change your life?ā Weāre pretty happy at how this is turning out.
We are jazzed to learn more about you in every comment, and Iām sure Iām not the only one who is awaiting this secret project of yours.
Woohoo, Betsy!
This post hits the nail on the head! Onwards through the wall(s)!
OMG.. I understand exactly.. thanks for putting it out there and for keeping yourself on track via the blog⦠I need to do the same and make myself accountable!
Rhonda, you know Iām *hating* the idea that I told you guys I would track myself publicly. Ugh. I guess that is Resistance rearing her ugly head.
It is painful, but just the right kick in the pants you need. Good luck!
Great post, Betsy. Iām glad to see that youāre moving forward with your book, and will be posting your progress online. Thatās good for building accountability, which will help you overcome the resistance that you have articulates so well.
As you know, I have managed to complete a book (still unpublished). The way that I was able to do it was based on a suggestion from Stephen King, who writes a little bit. He says that you have to devote a section of your day to writing, and it should be the same section every day. Instead of looking for an opportunity in each day to write, tell yourself that between the hours of X and Y, youāre writing, and doing nothing else. It helps if your husband is on board too, and even better if he can have a project to work on while youāre writing. (With Warren, that wonāt be a problem.) I did my writing for two hours every day after Jena went to sleep, and got the book completed surprisingly quickly.
The other thing to keep in mind is that when you complete your final word on your final page, youāre not done. If you want anybody to actually read your book, youāll need to spend time editing too, and that takes longer than most people think. I could edit about twice as many pages in an hour as I could write, but the ratio is different for everybody. (Actually, Mr. King suggests to put the manuscript in a drawer for a month before you take it out and start editing, which is a pretty good idea.) But be sure to set your expectations to include significant time to fine-tune (or sledgehammer) what youāve written.
Good luck, and keep posting!
Joe, thanks for your insights. I remember when you asked me to read the draft of your book and how much I enjoyed it. It still gives me a thrill knowing that I have friends who are writers, like you have some kind of secret knowledge the rest of us donāt have because you finished writing a book.
Iāve decided to devote a couple of hours a day to the project - the same time every morning - and Iām learning that a lot more goes into this than writing for the blog. For one thing, if my writing time is set for first thing in the morning, it greatly impacts what Iām able to do the night before. Or vice versa, if you know what I mean. After two very fun nights out in a row, I could see the impact on my writing the next morning.
The plan is to continue to write as long as we are in Edinburgh on this schedule, then take a month to camp and hike as we planned, and then devote myself to writing and/or editing again in late July when we start a month-long housesitting gig in Brussels. I realize it will be a long haul, and Iām prepared for it. It would be nice to write the book in a month - and I guess that could happen - but my expectations are reasonable and Iām going with the idea that small, regular progress is better than infrequent big progress.
Thanks again for the tips, Joe. You guys are definitely going to keep me on task!
Oh my Godā¦.Loved this book. LOVED. Chock full of juicy nuggets ot kick you in the ass.
Congrats on buckling down to start the book, Betsy. So proud of you. I also kicked myself into gear to start work on my second book, about my brain aneurysm. Finally decided to make it happen and interviewed several writing coaches to help me overcome the resistance and the overwhelm. She will help me with an outline, the flow and figuring out what stays and what goes. I realized that was my resistance for too long and Iām DONE!
Stay tuned for more (BTW, you will most likely me mentioned in it, of course!)
Although - remember tomake time do the literary pub tour in Edinburgh. It was so much fun!
Maria, Iām so excited that you are going to share your story. And it doesnāt surprise me one bit that we are both motivated by this little gem of an ebook. Please keep me posted on your progress - Iām interested in your work with a writing coach.
And the literary pub tour is on our list - along with 1000 other things. There is really so much to do and see here, and we keep getting distracted from our list by all the friendly and fun people. You could easily lose yourself for months in this great place. I can see why you married a Scotsman!
We have just been looking for resistance bands ourselves, as we figure that will come in pretty key for keeping in shape. In reality though I do recognize that bringing them and using them are two different thingsā¦.and truth be told if it was up to me, mine would likely collect dustā¦fortunately I have married a fitness nut (who is also damm near a decade younger than me), so I think I will be forced into working out whether I like it or not!!
On another note, we land in London June 19, and do hope to spend a few nights in Scotland as wellā¦I think that would be absolutely incredible if we could somehow catch up!!!
Keep in touch!
Skott, weād love to meet up with you guys! We are in Edinburgh until June 24, when we leave for a week to hike Hadrianās Wall. After that, weāll be slowly making our way down to the London area over a couple of weeks. I think we could probably figure out a way to meet up along the way.
Yes, hopefully we can work something outā¦as it stands now, we were thinking the 19th - 22nd on the Isle of Wight, then visiting a friend in Maidstone from the 24th - 26th or soā¦and then heading up to Scotland after that ā¦maybe we try to meet in the middle somewhereā¦keep you posted.
Oh yes, did you get to Edinburgh from London? Did you bus up there? Any advice?
Skott, we took the train from York to Edinburgh because we were already up there. You can save a lot of $$ by purchasing your tickets ahead of time online, though you need to have them mailed to you (ours came in just a couple of days). We saved a lot of money this way. To find out travel deals on trains and buses check out these sites (hat tip to our friend Kath for sharing them with us): http://www.thetrainline.com/buytickets/ and http://uk.megabus.com/Default.aspx and http://www.nationalexpress.com/home.aspx
@Betsy:
This post isnāt entirely unrelated to the concept of a āstop doingā list. On my list of things to āstopā doing is Facebook. And random web browsing. Realistically, neither are going to be stopped entirely, but even the idea of trimming back to 10-15 minutes of FB a day is meeting some āresistanceā. I think Iām going to have to start using a timer to constrain the FB time!
Facebook can be a huge time suck for me, but because we are so far away from family and friends I justify it by saying I donāt get to actually spend time with them in person. But I do have to turn it off when I really want to write or get something done. āStop doingā can be as simple as setting a limit with a timer, as you suggested. No need to go all cold turkey here.
@Betsy @Skott:
BTW, you āpack up your world and wander for a yearā people are starting to really annoy me. I just might have to start planning a similar adventure. Itāll be a different experience, as I normally work a lot and then take a bunch of time āoffā to relax around the house or travel for a while. A while, the last time, was 6 weeks. And I met a lot of people out for 3 months, 6 months, 12 months and āas long as our money lastsā trips.
Rob, I like this idea. Work for a while, play for a while. It is really how all of us should live, donāt you think?
Hi, Iām new to your blog and have been reading older posts to catch up with your story. So interesting and Iām so inspired by what Iāve read about your journey. I think it is great that you want to write a book. When I was visiting this site http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2011/05/why-and-how-i-self-published-a-book/
it made me think of you. Serindipidy? Iāve been trying to be diligent about writing everyday so I can exercise that muscle and work towards being a better communicator over at my knitting blog. Thanks for reminding me that it is never to late to dream, have goals and enjoy life.
The Lost Girls, your site and various others are fueling my already active wunderlust. Urgh. Iām going into planning mode this summer for my RTW escape. Curious - where did you look for a house sitting gig?
Hi, Bree. Congrats to you for making the decision to indulge your wanderlust! Housesitting is a great option for extending your travel and getting to know a place. We got our start with friends and friends of friends, and when we decided to get serious about it we signed up for a few services. Dalene at Hecktic Travels has written a great starter on getting into housesitting: http://www.hecktictravels.com/housesitting-101
Good luck!
I said I would update my progress, and so far I havenāt figured out a good way to do it with a sidebar widget. Just to stay accountable, I can tell you that the plan was to write for 6 days per week (with Sundays off) from 6-8 a.m. every day. Afternoons were also open for some writing, but I did not set any specific requirements around it.
Iāve missed 2 days of morning writing due to company. It was my fault since I did not come up with a contingency plan since both events were planned in advance. A couple of other days I slept in a bit and wrote from 7-9 instead, which impacted the plans we made for activities and caused a bit of strain. Again, poor planning on my part.
So, the writing continues and it is even more difficult than I imagined. The 3-day novel challenge I did a couple of years ago was difficult, but this one seems even harder because there is more time to goof off. The hourly commitment is about the same for both projects, funny enough.
http://www.marriedwithluggage.com/2009/09/11/video-post-how-to-write-a-novel-in-3-days/
My mind is swimming with ideas to go off on crazy tangents, and I have to really work to keep it in check. My level of discipline in this area is not what I would like.
So, the project continues. I will have another update for you soon in the form of a blog post.
For those of you also writing or doing projects this month - how is it going for you? Are you experiencing the same kinds of challenges or is it smooth sailing? I would love to hear from you.